


One Shots

by CaptainDwobbit



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, M/M, Nori is a Little Shit, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-24
Updated: 2016-02-14
Packaged: 2018-05-16 00:57:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5807083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainDwobbit/pseuds/CaptainDwobbit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a bunch of one shots I've all written for the hobbit. My excuses if I completely butcher a character.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. If You Will Have Me

**Author's Note:**

> Yep, I put all my little drabbles together in one big One Shot post! I just thought it would be annoying if I kept posting very short stories as separate fics.
> 
> This one is based on the imagine 'Imagine slow dancing with Thorin to ‘Yayo’ by Lana del Rey' by imaginexhobbit on Tumblr!
> 
> Thorin x Female!Reader

Gosh, it is hot outside, you thought for the fifth time today. You sighed and ran a hand through your hair, turning on the vintage radio on the small table next to your couch and making your way to the kitchen. You were immediately annoyed by the pop song that was playing. You’d heard that song at least ten times this week! But you pushed your annoyance away as well as you could and started filling the sink with hot water after rolling up your sleeves. Since your amazingly handy boyfriend had broken the dishwasher, you had to do the dishes, like this now.  
  
Speaking of the devil, you felt two strong arms wrap around your waist and pull you against a broad chest. You sighed contently and turned off the tap, turning around and wrapping your arms around his neck, your thumbs tracing small circles on his skin. Thorin smiled down at you, a twinkle in his warm blue eyes. The irritating pop song stopped and made place for a new one, its intro sounding much more appealing to you.  
Thorin grinned mischievously and took a step back, holding out his hand. “May I have this dance, my lady?” You suppressed a giggle and put your hand in his, letting him pull you against his body. The two of you danced slowly around your kitchen, the same way you had on your aunt’s wedding a few years before, when you had taken him as a date. You had shared your first kiss there as well.  
Thorin pulled you out of your thoughts by resting his chin on top of your head and you closed your eyes, happy to be so close to him. “Remember my aunt’s wedding?” You broke the silence, your voice soft. He merely hummed in acknowledgement and pulled you even closer. You inhaled his scent and it made you feel even more secure, knowing you were home with the best man in the entire world.  
  
“We should play that song at our wedding," he mumbled into your hair when the song was over. You chuckled and pulled back a little so you could look up at him. “Our wedding?” He smiled and let go of you so he could take a step back. You gasped in surprise when he got onto one knee and pulled a little box from his back pocket. “Only if you will have me, (Y/N).” He opened the box, showing the most beautiful ring you’d ever seen. Maybe your opinion was biased, since you loved Thorin so dearly.  
You sniffled and nodded, holding out your hand. He beamed and took your shaking hand in his, sliding the ring on your finger with his own, nimble ones. “I love you, my heart," he said once he got up. All you could do at that moment was jump into his arms and kiss him.  
  
And if you were both crying while smiling like idiots, no one could blame you, right?


	2. Giant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dwalin is nicer than he lets on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on 'Imagine Dwalin carrying you on his back, a human, and saying that you are lighter than his axes' by imaginexhobbit on Tumblr ( http://imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com/ )
> 
> Dwalin x Reader 
> 
> Reader is gender neutral

You had been feeling light-headed for the past few days, but you had no idea why. At first you thought it had been the mushrooms in Bombur’s stew, but the rest of the company appeared to be doing fine. It could also be the cold weather. You weren’t really used to sleeping outside at night, and your clothes couldn’t always keep you warm. You often wished you had fur cloaks, like the dwarves.

You hadn’t really realized you’d slowed down and gotten pretty far behind the rest until Fili and Kili walked back to you and asked if you were okay. You nodded and rubbed your shaking hands together. “I’m fine, but thanks for asking.” Kili shook his head, his dark brows furrowed. He looked a lot like his uncle when he did this, and it freaked you out a little. “No you’re not. You look even more pale than Azog and you only had a few bites of the eggs Bombur prepared for breakfast. And we all know you love eggs!”  
You sighed and rolled your eyes, though you found his concern adorable. “Okay, you caught me. I don’t feel very well. I think it’s a cold or something. I’ll manage.” In truth, you felt horrible and _very_ hungry. But your headache was making you nauseous, so you weren’t quite sure if you wanted to eat.   
  
Just then, black spots danced in front of your eyes and you groaned, grabbing Kili’s sleeve to stay upright. Fili quickly wrapped an arm around your waist and called for his uncle. The rest of the dwarves arrived in no-time, bombarding the brothers with questions about what had happened (Or in Thorin’s case, what they had done this time). The brothers’ answers weren’t very helpful and neither were yours. Oin had forced you to sit down so he could check your pulse while he asked you questions about your health.  
  
“Low blood sugar”, the old healer said after what felt like ages. “You can’t walk around like this.” He pulled an apple out his pack and held it out to you, telling you to eat it. You silently bit into the apple, watching Oin and Thorin discuss something before Thorin walked over to Dwalin. They had a short conversation where Thorin asked Dwalin a question and the bald dwarf nodded, looking your way.   
You huffed and averted your gaze, taking the last few bites out of your apple and throwing its core in some bushes. You were mad at yourself from keeping the Company here. You wondered why they hadn’t left without you yet, since you weren’t that useful.  
  
The sound of heavy boots stomping pulled you out of your thoughts and you looked up to see Dwalin walk towards you. You bit your lip, trying to calm your racing heart. You really liked the warrior. At first he had seem like a cold barbarian to you, but as you got to know him you figured out that under those layers of scary, angry and intimidating Dwarf, he was just a nice guy. A very nice guy. You looked back up to take a second look at Dwalin, who now stood in front of you.

“On yer feet, Giant. I’m carrying you.” You stood up -you were just a little bit taller than him!- and barely had any time to protest when he lifted you into his arms, picking you up bridal-style.  “Mahal, you’re lighter than my axes!” He exclaimed.   
“Maybe your axes are just very heavy”, you retorted. That made the warrior snort and go into a rant about how great his axes were.  
  
But you couldn’t really complain, you felt very secure in your crush’s strong arms.  



	3. Doing The Dishes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bofur is a little cutiepie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, Bofur is one of my favourite dwarves, so I really hope I did him some justice.  
> This was not based on an imagine, but it was a production of my love for Bofur. 
> 
> Bofur x GenderNeutral!Reader

You looked over your shoulder at the dwarves behind you. Some of them looked just as exhausted as you felt, while others, mainly Kili, Fili and Bofur, didn’t appear to be tired at all. From the looks of it, Bofur was telling ‘the lads’, as everyone called them, one of his inappropriate jokes and they - of course- were laughing. You looked ahead of you again, watching the rest of the company. They all looked tired and most of them were sweating, Bombur the most. That didn’t surprise you at all, though. You often wondered how they even breathed in those fur coats. and they had so much hair… Much more than you. But during the cold nights this quest forced you to face, you envied them. Even your warmest sweater wasn’t able to keep you warm.  
Bofur had given you one of his thick tunics at one point, and though it had been too short in you, -you were short, but he was still a dwarf- you had sent him a grateful smile. Fortunately, now the sun was shining brightly and the thought of those cold nights only appealed to you.

“Alright, let’s set up camp here.” Thorin’s voice sounded like an angel’s singing to you. Letting out a relieved sigh, you threw your backpack on the ground.  
“Don’t be so rough, (Y/N), you may cause an earthquake,” Fili teased you.  
“Indeed, we wouldn’t want to get crushed by one of these trees,” his equally annoying brother piped in.  
Damn those pests. You rolled your eyes at them and stated unpacking your things, laying your bedroll on the smoothest bit of ground you could find. You looked up when Bofur put his bedroll next to yours, muttering something about Bombur taking up too much space. You chuckled, but didn’t say anything.

When the camp was all set up, Bombur started cooking dinner. The scent of stew made your stomach growl and you wondered where Bombur had gotten the ingredients this time. You hadn’t passed by any villages. Maybe Fili and Kili had gone hunting again. They’d brought back a few bunnies a few days ago. The mere memory of it made you shudder. While it had tasted good, you still thought bunnies were too cute to eat.  
“What’s the matter, (Y/N)?” Ori asked you from his spot on your right. He’d looked up from his sketchbook, only to see you shudder.  
You smiled and shook your head. “Just bunnies.”  
Before he could ask any questions, Bombur announced that dinner was ready and Thorin told you to gather around the fire. That order was absolutely unnecessary, since everyone but him had been sitting by the fire already. But there was no way you were going to tell the grumpy king. He scared you, even though you were taller than him.

After dinner, you and Bofur had to wash the bowls since it was your turn. Bofur was awfully quiet during your walk and it worried you. Normally he wouldn’t stop singing and you had to shush him.  
“Something wrong, Bof?” you asked with a frown on your face. The dwarf jumped a little. You’d obviously interrupted his thoughts.  
He smiled at you. “No, just don’t feel like washing these again.” He held up the bowls. “I’m sure the lads spit in theirs again.” You laughed at the disgusted look on his face. “I wonder if those boys will ever grow up.” Bofur shook his head with a sad look on his face. “I’m afraid they won’t.”

You finally arrived at the lake after what felt like forever and you were amazed by how clear the water was. “Oh, this is beautiful. I bet it’d be great to swim in. And you dwarves could use a bath.” You grinned and Bofur sent you a hurt look.  
“We smell just fine. Not everyone can smell like flowers.”  
You raised an eyebrow at him. “You think I smell like flowers?”  
The dwarf flushed and hurried over to the lake.

“Oh, come on, Bof. I was just teasing you.” You sat down next to the silent dwarf and gently shoved his shoulder. “I wish I smelled like flowers.”  
Bofur looked up at you, a small smile tugging at his lips. “But you do. You smell even better than flowers.”  
You blinked at that, unsure of how to react. Was Bofur flirting with you? Judging from his shy smile, the answer to the question was yes.  
You grinned like an idiot. “I appreciated the compliment, Bof.” You leaned over and kissed his cheek, his beard tickling your chin.

“(Y/N),  I..” Bofur started, but closed his mouth again. You were about to dip the dirty bowls into the water when Bofur suddenly pulled you towards him and kissed you. You gasped against his lips, but allowed him to pull you closer.  
You leaned into his touch and tugged onto one of his braids when he wanted to pull back. The kiss felt like it lasted forever, but neither of you minded.  
  


When you finally returned to camp, it was already dark. Thorin would’ve given you the first watch if it hadn’t been for the courting braids in your hair.


	4. More Than His Knives

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The reader has a confession to make. So does Fíli. (AKA: I'm bad at writing summaries.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No warnings
> 
> Word count: 463
> 
> Ship: Fíli x reader
> 
> Based on: Imagine Fili saying he loves you more than all his knives (From @imaginexhobbit )
> 
> I had no beta this time, since I just wanted to post this as soon as I finished. Sorry for any mistakes. I’d like to thank @theimaginesyouneveraskedfor, @writer-of-bagend, @averil-of-fairlea @fromthedeskoftheraven on Tumblr (Plus @little-red-83 , but it won’t let me tag her) and everyone else who has ever encouraged or inspired me to write. 
> 
> (Whenever I read the 'your palms were sweaty'-part I just think about Mom's Spaghetti)

Your heart was beating in your throat and your palms were sweaty. You’d fought countless battles, yet you did not feel brave this very moment.   
But you had promised yourself you would finally confess, and what kind of person would you be if you couldn’t even keep your own promises? You ran a hand through your thick hair for the hundredth time, but it just wouldn’t listen to you.  
  
You listened to the sounds of the feast you could hear through the thick doors. Well, it was now or never. You’d confess your love to Fíli. If he didn’t return your feelings, you could still move to Dale, right? The other dwarves wouldn’t mind, that much was true. They often wondered why in Mahal’s name their king let a child of men come along on their quest(You were part human, part dwarf, but others often seemed to forget that). You know you wouldn’t have minded that much if you hadn’t fallen in love with the heir to the throne. If the people were against your presence already, how would they feel if you ever started courting Fíli?   
  
A hand landing on your shoulder startled you out of your thoughts and you quickly turned around, only to be face to face(well, not quite..) with your favourite dwarf. “Is everything all right, (Y/N)?” He asked when you had stared at him for about a minute. “U-uh, yes. It’s just.. I was actually looking for you, Fíli! Can we talk in private?” You were annoyed by how high your voice sounded, but Fíli did not seem to mind. “Uh, of course?” He seemed a little confused, but he let you lead him away from the íparty and to your rooms.   
  
“I do think uncle Thorin will scold me for not being appropriate if he finds out about this”, Fíli joked, though it made your heart flutter and your cheeks turn red. “I.. Well, actually, um..” You cleared your throat and took a deep breath to calm your nerves a little. “I know how we can make this more appropriate.”   
Fíli frowned at you, but then his eyes widened in realization. “You mean..?” You nodded quickly. “Oh, Mahal, I thought you’d never ask!” Fíli was quick to grab your hand and tug you down slightly so he could kiss your lips. You happily returned the kiss, hoping this wasn’t a dream and that you wouldn’t wake up in your bed.   
  
After a while, you pulled back and looked down at him. “I was scared you’d never want to court me..” Fíli shook his head, his moustache braids swaying. “Mahal, (Y/N)! I love you more than my knives!”   
  
And you just had to kiss him again after that, for everyone knew how much Fíli loved those knives.


	5. Of Silverware and Cheeky Bastards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nori is a little shit. But he's also your little shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentines Day, people!
> 
> This is my first time ever writing Nori. This wouldn't be such a big deal if I had read more Nori fics, which I haven't.

Unbelievable. You had opened your backpack, only for yet another silver spoon to fall out. You wondered how on earth it had gotten there. You certainly didn’t have a spoon with you when you were somehow teleported to Middle-Earth. You’d only had your coat, your backpack, your phone and a few other things. But you were quite certain you never brought spoons with you.  
And this wasn’t the first time this had happened, too. You now had a small collection of silverware. Not that you minded that much, since silverware was expensive, but you still wondered who put it there.

And that’s how you decided to keep a close eye on your backpack. You asked Thorin to take the watch Kíli had with Nori. You used the excuse that his sister-son looked very tired and probably hadn’t slept for a while. Thorin, of course, didn’t hesitate to tell Kíli to go to bed earlier, and the rest of The Company –except for you and Nori- soon followed.  
Supper had been sparse because the boys hadn’t been able to catch any game, so your stomach growled so loudly you were afraid it would wake someone up. You rubbed it absently and looked up at the sky, only for someone to wave some jerky in your line of vision. You looked questioningly to Nori, who grinned at you. “Thought you might be hungry. Unless there’s a bear in that stomach of yours.” You giggled and quickly took the jerky. “It wasn’t that loud”, you mumbled as you chewed on it. 

Nori snorted. “Sure it wasn’t. If Thorin was awake, he would’ve insisted on scouting the woods because he thought there were warg scouts nearby.” You laughed, happy that the darkness was hiding your blush. “But then he would’ve kept me from going on my own quest.” The dwarf raised an eyebrow at you. “Your own quest, eh?” He leaned closer to you, obviously interested. “Do tell me more.”  
You leaned closer as well, your voice a soft whisper. “Someone keeps putting silverware in my backpack, and I need to find out who.” Something in Nori’s eyes changed, but he quickly recomposed himself. “Don’t you like shiny things?” You furrowed your brow, but nodded anyway. “Of course I do, but-“ “Oh, thank Mahal. I feared you wouldn’t like them.”

That’s when the little wheels in your head stopped turning and everything just.. clicked. “It was you?” At his nod, you pulled back a little. “Why were you putting silverware in my backpack, Nori?”  
Nori smiled sheepishly. “Right, you don’t know of the courting traditions us dwarves have.” Courting traditions? Did that word mean what you think it meant? “You mean.. You like me? Like, like me like me?” Nori looked greatly confused by that. “Eh, if that is your definition of ‘love’, then yes. I do indeed ‘like you like you’.”

Once more, he made you laugh. “Oh, you silly dwarf, I love you too!” He grinned widely and wrapped his arms around your waist, kissing you on the lips. His lips were slightly dry and chapped, but that didn’t take away how great the kiss was. His beard did tickle a little, though, but you knew you’d just have to get used to that.

You were taken aback when he pulled something out of his pocket and held it out to you. You looked down at his open hand, staring at the small bead on the palm of his hand. “I.. suppose this is a dwarven tradition as well?” Nori smiled and grabbed your chin, gently lifting your face. “Let me put a courting braid in your hair.” And really, how could you say no to that cheeky little bastard? 

No one but Bilbo seemed to be surprised by the braid you had in your hair the morning after. Dori grumbled that it was about time you noticed his brother’s affection. Ori gave you a scarf he knitted, and really, you had to keep yourself from crying out of happiness. Soon Nori and you would get married and live in the mountain together.

After all, you did believe the worst was behind you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I stole Bilbo's line. *gasp*


End file.
